Pregnancy dreams.

I kept having the same vivid dream come back again and again last night. Given that I have to get up about 10 times a night to use the bathroom, I'm amazed that I can even fall back asleep, much less drift into the same dream.

I dreamed my husband, who I will refer to as Mr. Manx, and his dad were sent to Iraq. They had been there for 4 months and came home for a very short visit and had to leave again for 2 months. We didn’t know if they would be back home in time for the delivery since they might have to stay longer. While parts of the "reunion" were quite good, (no details, you'll have to use your imagination for that part) the parting was just awful. I kept crying and feeling the most terrible pain, fear, desperation.

I kept trying to get myself to quit dreaming about it but it did no good- it just kept coming back every time I fell asleep again sort of picking up like a story would every time I got back to sleep. The dream finally ended with Mr. Manx and his unit staying at Mr. Manx's dad's house on their last night (why, I have no clue) but he couldn't stay with me and I couldn't stay at the house- something about their unit needing to all be together or some stupid shit like that. I ended with me running down a bunch of steps and crying (pregnant- running down steps) why it's our last night- why? I finally woke myself up and could see a bit of light outside so just tried to stay awake. Man, was I happy to be awake.

I know this has a lot to do with my bro. He is probably in Iraq now- he's in the army and was sent over a couple weeks ago and has been training in Afghanistan. Last word was that he was shipping out within 2 days - and it's been over 2 days.

I wish I could shake the feelings my dream gave me but it just creeps back off and on- there's no shaking what I feel when I think of my bro over there though. Guess this is just my mind's way of dealing with fears, etc. and processing all this stuff.

One good thing is that I seem to have put the diet thing in perspective - for now, at least. Maybe when a far worse potential reality appears, it makes your current one seem much more tolerable.

I will probably be very clingy with mr manx tonight, but I doubt he will care. I'm not a super clingy person (I don't think anyway) so I'm sure he'll appreciate any extra attention.